Thursday, March 31, 2011

Emotional v. Analytical

This post is spurred off a friend's post entitled "unemotional." His point is that he guards his emotions and keeps them close so that he can have more personal peace and tranquility in his life and keep drama out. He posits that if you keep emotions out of the picture and use logic and reason to approach problems, the problems will be solved much faster and with less pain than if you had allowed your emotions to dictate your response.

I understand completely your need to guard your emotions. I try to do this, too, and I always feel a little stronger when I do. However, I struggle with control and how controlled I should be and when the need to control becomes a problem.
Here's some of my thoughts on the subject, and I warn you, they're all over the place since I've been sporadically thinking these things out over the past couple weeks:

1. Being less emotional makes me feel in control of the sitation.
2. However, being in control of the situation is not a good thing if I become "controlling."
3. I have a control problem. I want to be in control of all situations at all times.
4. That's not reality.
5. And that's not what God wants from me.
6. So, I have to learn to temper my need to control and analyze every situation with a healthy dose of acceptance and intentional peace. In other words, "I have to let go and let God." Cliched, yes. But true in MANY situations.
7. Now, being in control of your emotions and being able to clearly look at a situation unclouded by irrational feelings and fears is a fantastic skill to have.
8. But where is the line drawn between being logical and analytical in a situation v. feeling more and letting your "heart" decide things?
9. I don't have the answer to this question.
10. In fact, I don't have the answers to any of these questions.
11. But, I will probably decide the answers based on analysis and logic. That's just what I do.
12. Which brings me to the statement that my friend made in his blog, when he said "I've decided what to lend emotions to and what not to lend emotions to and I lend my emotions to those things I deem worthy."
13. What is the standard for worthiness?
14. How does one deem a situation, a person, worthy of your emotions?
15. I'm curious.
16. Because there needs to be a standard since living by randomness and picking and choosing how to react as the situation presents itself is an emotional decision.
17. So what are your thoughts on that? How would you approach that?

Do you have any answers for me? Any comments?


  1. I know that I've been told so many times that I ned to pick and choose my battles as a mom and, even one step further, as a wife. I don't think there is one standard for worthiness because what may be important to me, may not be important to you. So that's a matter of perspective. I think when dealing with that you just have to remember that because you think a certain way means the other person does as well.

  2. I tend to look at situations that involve other people from the standpoint of why is this particular person worth the trouble (by trouble I mean the turbulence that you go through in your heart when you get emotional)? I tend to look inward and examine what this person adds to my life and why having them in it is important. The more that I see that they add to my life simply by being in it, the more I can honestly put my all into analyzing the problem AND trying to maintain rationale when dealing with something. When it comes to people that I don't know, I kinda do the opposite and just tell myself that they aren't going to get overly upset about something dealing with me so I just try to mellow out and not get too hot and cold when dealing with them. I am very emotional (more so in an unhealthy way because I am so extreme in my feelings) so I almost HAVE to be more analytical because things get out of control when I just go off of how I feel...